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Paul Valery Paul Valery

"What others think of us would be of little moment did it not, when known, so deeply tinge what we think of ourselves."…

Ann Landers Ann Landers

"Television has proved that people will look at anything rather than each other."…

A. J. Liebling A. J. Liebling

"Freedom of the press is limited to those who own one."…

Foster’s Law Foster’s Law

"The only people who find what they are looking for in life are the fault finders."…

Garry Shandling Garry Shandling

"I'm too shy to express my sexual needs except over the phone to people I don't know."…

Edward Abbey Edward Abbey

"No tyranny is so irksome as petty tyranny: the officious demands of policemen, government clerks, and electromechanical gadgets."…

Hobart Brown Hobart Brown

"Money doesn't always bring happiness. People with ten million dollars are no happier than people with nine million dollars."…

Jerry Garcia Jerry Garcia

"Somebody has to do something, and it's just incredibly pathetic that it has to be us."…

Peter De Vries Peter De Vries

"It is the final proof of God's omnipotence that he need not exist in order to save us."…

Peter da Silva Peter da Silva

"Ahhh. A man with a sharp wit. Someone ought to take it away from him before he cuts himself."…

Leo J. Burke Leo J. Burke

"People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one."…

Arthur C. Clarke Arthur C. Clarke

"If we have learned one thing from the history of invention and discovery, it is that, in the long run - and often in the short one - the most daring prophecies seem laughably conservative."…

Cullen Hightower Cullen Hightower

"Those who agree with us may not be right, but we admire their astuteness."…

Rita Rudner Rita Rudner

"I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctor's office was full of portraits by Picasso."…

Walter Bagehot Walter Bagehot

"It is good to be without vices, but it is not good to be without temptations."…

David Hoselton David Hoselton

"I'm a jerk to everyone. Best way to protect yourself from lawsuits."…

John Erskine John Erskine

"Music is the only language in which you cannot say a mean or sarcastic thing."…

Norman Douglas Norman Douglas

"Education is a state-controlled manufactory of echoes."…

Steven Wright Steven Wright

"There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot."…

Lois McMaster Bujold Lois McMaster Bujold

"The will to be stupid is a very powerful force, but there are always alternatives."…

David T. Wolf David T. Wolf

"Idealism is what precedes experience; cynicism is what follows."…

Oliver Wendell Holmes Oliver Wendell Holmes

"Life is a fatal complaint, and an eminently contagious one."…

Elvis Presley Elvis Presley

"I don't know anything about music. In my line you don't have to."…

Francois de La Rochefoucauld Francois de La Rochefoucauld

"Gratitude is merely the secret hope of further favors."…

Miguel de Cervantes Miguel de Cervantes

"Everyone is as God has made him, and oftentimes a great deal worse."…

Jane Austen Jane Austen

"Silly things do cease to be silly if they are done by sensible people in an impudent way."…

Augusten Burroughs Augusten Burroughs

"I myself am made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions."…

Russell Green Russell Green

"The advantage of a classical education is that it enables you to despise the wealth that it prevents you from achieving."…

Agatha Christie Agatha Christie

"If one sticks too rigidly to one's principles, one would hardly see anybody."…

Henry David Thoreau Henry David Thoreau

"A man is rich in proportion to the number of things he can afford to let alone."…

Doug Larson Doug Larson

"A lot of people mistake a short memory for a clear conscience."…

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