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Aldous Huxley Aldous Huxley

"The author of the Iliad is either Homer or, if not Homer, somebody else of the same name."…

Eric Hoffer Eric Hoffer

"Rudeness is the weak man's imitation of strength."…

Henry James Henry James

"She was a woman who, between courses, could be graceful with her elbows on the table."…

Robert Heinlein Robert Heinlein

"The supreme irony of life is that hardly anyone gets out of it alive."…

Frank Deford Frank Deford

"I believe that professional wrestling is clean and everything else in the world is fixed."…

Robertson Davies Robertson Davies

"Every man is wise when attacked by a mad dog; fewer when pursued by a mad woman; only the wisest survive when attacked by a mad notion."…

Tom Lehrer Tom Lehrer

"I wish people who have trouble communicating would just shut up."…

Peter Steiner Peter Steiner

"On the Internet, nobody knows you're a dog."…

Buzz Aldrin Buzz Aldrin

"I believe that every human has a finite number of heart-beats. I don't intend to waste any of mine running around doing exercises."…

Charles M. Schulz Charles M. Schulz

"There's a difference between a philosophy and a bumper sticker."…

Nancy Astor Nancy Astor

"The penalty for success is to be bored by the people who used to snub you."…

Abraham Lincoln Abraham Lincoln

"'Tis better to be silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt."…

Mickey Rooney Mickey Rooney

"Always get married early in the morning. That way, if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted a whole day."…

Thomas Neill Thomas Neill

"Of those who say nothing, few are silent."…

Dick Clark Dick Clark

"Humor is always based on a modicum of truth. Have you ever heard a joke about a father-in-law?"…

Alexander Hamilton Alexander Hamilton

"A national debt, if it is not excessive, will be to us a national blessing."…

Bill Nye Bill Nye

"Humor is everywhere, in that there's irony in just about anything a human does."…

Dylan Thomas Dylan Thomas

"An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do."…

Henny Youngman Henny Youngman

"I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays."…

Paul Dirac Paul Dirac

"In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it's the exact opposite."…

Edward Young Edward Young

"Some for renown, on scraps of learning dote, /And think they grow immortal as they quote."…

Clare Booth Luce Clare Booth Luce

"Censorship, like charity, should begin at home; but, unlike charity, it should end there."…

Edward R. Murrow Edward R. Murrow

"When the politicians complain that TV turns the proceedings into a circus, it should be made clear that the circus was already there, and that TV has merely demonstrated that not all the performers are well trained."…

Evan Esar Evan Esar

"Statistics: The only science that enables different experts using the same figures to draw different conclusions."…

George Orwell George Orwell

"On the whole human beings want to be good, but not too good, and not quite all the time."…

Herb Caen Herb Caen

"I tend to live in the past because most of my life is there."…

G. K. Chesterton G. K. Chesterton

"Poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese."…

G. K. Chesterton G. K. Chesterton

"Poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese."…

Donald Foster Donald Foster

"No one who cannot rejoice in the discovery of his own mistakes deserves to be called a scholar."…

Stephen Colbert Stephen Colbert

"There's an old saying about those who forget history. I don't remember it, but it's good."…

W. Somerset Maugham W. Somerset Maugham

"Sometimes people carry to such perfection the mask they have assumed that in due course they actually become the person they seem."…

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